On entertaining - Lessons learned from 2011

Lessons learned.

What a terrific summer. I'm really going to miss it. Sunny days. Just enough rain to keep the lawn nicely green. Beautiful nights. And some terrific parties!

I thought it would be fun to examine some of this past summer's entertaining. See what worked. And see what, let's just say, could be improved. We'll take a look at choices in location, decor and menu. I should note some of these events were ones I hosted. (I'll be most critical of these). Others, I was a guest. (Can't be too critical or I might be seen as unappreciative!) So here goes, we'll take a look at three:

- Al fresco dining

- A night of tapas

- Preview of  fall

Al fresco dining

This was to be small gathering, mostly family, celebrating a birthday. Fine china and formal dining room felt too stuffy. With the weather predicted to be perfect, outside was the place to be. Given that I was also hosting a few folks for the first time, I wanted to up the ante a little bit. To me, that meant avoiding the burgers on the grill, etc.  I wanted an informal, yet elegant sit-down affair - something a little unexpected.

The good.

With 11 people, I wanted to try a new outside location. The screened in porch was an option, but too much furniture would need to be relocated to fit the tables. I also wanted, if possible, to avoid the super long event table. I felt this group would enjoy having more options of cross table conversation. So I decided to play with a our square patio area to see what might work.  

The space is very intimate since it's nestled within three exterior walls. Our outdoor round table, usually located in this space, wasn't an option since it could only seat 6 (7 if necessary). So, I decided to try a pair of 6' banquet tables placed side by side - width-wise. Something never tried before. Success! I didn't think it would fit. We certainly needed to make some adjustments (e.g. move the outdoor grill and some plants), but the square top idea nailed it.  

I decided to keep the table decor simple since I knew the food would be served "family style."  A couple of flowers from the yard and some pieces from the house helped add some punch to the everyday china and glassware. Crisp cotton table cloths and napkins also added an additional touch.  It was a late afternoon affair so candles  were unnecessary.

The "lesson learned"

The menu ended up being problematic.  It sounded simple: grilled Masala rubbed shrimp, seared bok choy (grill), and Indonesian curry pasta with vegetables. The grill items were fine, easily prepped ahead of time, seared outside and easily served. The Indonesian curry was another matter. I chose this dish since it was a favorite of the birthday girl. Bad decision. Not an easy dish for 11 people since it was best prepared in a wok - a vessel with limited capacity (and I only had one of them).

So with everyone enjoying themselves outside, I was relegated to the kitchen making four batches, back-to-back. All ingredients were prepped and ready to go, yet it made little difference.  The preparation was messy (since I was unsuccessfully trying to speed it up), time consuming (since the cooking had a "liquid reducing over heat" component) and hot (inside over a burner on high).  Way too much stress on a host.

Right intent, but wrong occasion. For the most easy to execute entertaining, stick with recipes that can be made in advance.  A few final things (seasoning, warming, tossing) should be all that's necessary.


A night of tapas

This was a very fun summer evening concept.  It was hosted by our friends who wanted an event that celebrated a variety of unique tastes.

The good

The food was delicious. Some served hot, some served cold. All in small, appetizer-size servings. It was really fun to experience so many flavors in one setting.

The "lesson learned"

The evening also turned out to be beautiful so the hosts made an impromptu decision to move the eating location from the kitchen to the porch. How festive it seemed! Candlelight, cool evening breeze, fun conversation.

For the hosts, it was logistical chaos. We never really saw them.

Travel path

While the idea of moving the event outside was right, the reality of a multiple course dinner moved to a distant location, removed from the kitchen, made it a problem.  One host basically was isolated in the kitchen prepping each course while the other was running the plates back and forth. They also steadfastly refused any offers to help.

To me, keeping the guests with the chefs would have been the better decision.  The magic of a "tapas" evening is possibly witnessing the prep of each course. Sharing the ingredients, the recipes, the shopping excursions, and cooking insights along the way.

Admittedly, a night of multiple courses is a labor intensive exercise. The hosts made this conscious decision to create this unique event. I applaud that. But with this in mind, additional thought should then be made to keep the guests close or at least have an established system that embraces this reality (e.g. time-delayed coursing to give hosts a breather, specific helpers/guest "assignments", logistics totally worked out).

Luckily for me, this was a lesson learned that was observed (taken with a HUGE mental note). These days especially, it's hard for any guest to be totally comfortable when hosts are obviously working. A great meal is where everyone can relax, enjoy some great food and share the moment.


Preview of Fall

Another birthday celebration. An extended family affair. The nights around this time were a little cooler so I chose theme that involved Fall and comfort foods.

The good.

This was going to be an opportunity to use a new floor length tablecloth for our extended round dining room table (e.g. the topper extension that expands the diameter from 58" to 72").  The color was a tarnished gold box pattern over subtle dusty green - perfect for an end of the summer celebration.  It was also the 78th birthday of my mother, so a little more formality was deserved.

Now, I had a little bit of a design problem.  Most of my go-to table decor was silver, chrome or nickel accents.  Very little gold or brass. So I went about my tried and true seek and find exercise. (See prop closet post). As I am continually surprised, unanticipated ideas always present themselves.

The guest list was for 10.  The first items I found in the back of my china hutch were 6 of my mother's hand-me-down "Fall Harvest" design accent plates with gold trim. I knew I needed a creative solution to "extend the color scheme" to the additional four place-settings.  That, right now, would have to wait.

Next I found some long lost polished brass napkin rings.  The had to be clean up a little bit, but were a perfect compliment.

I think the biggest surprise were some candlesticks. I had all but given up on finding anything that would match. The crystal ones alone would have to do. But I came upon a forgotten box of stuff in the cellar that was left unsold from a summer yard sale. The sale was to help clear out unused/rarely used items in my, my mother's and a number of friend's houses.

Buried deep in the box were these 2 brass candlesticks. Again, a little tarnished but would easily clean up. I topped them with a couple of black shades. Presto! They were incredible. I had to smile. Who knew these where here?!?

The rest of the table came nicely together. Wine glasses. White linen napkins. Fall colored flowers.

I also found a solution to extend the accent plate color scheme.  I used my yellow and orange colored demi-tass saucers. I know this broke sooo many rules, (saucers vs. plates, different diameters, etc) but for this occasion, it worked.  The colors of each complimented each other.  It was a holistic visual statement as folks joined the table.  Protocol also quickly removes the accent plates anyway to prepare for the first course.

The "lesson learned"

I hate to admit it, but it was the food again.  This time I wanted a little "wow" factor so I prepared a sage sausage stuffed crown rack of pork, with an apple-brandy reduction.  The roast, potatoes and veggies all passed the "prepared ahead of time" rule for entertaining. The only thing needing a final preparation would be the apple-branding reduction made with the pan drippings - not a problem.  The learning issue arose when it was time to serve.

I hadn't thought through how the roast would be served - table side or plated in the kitchen. If table side, then all of the other items would need to be served family style. I hadn't planned for this. No warmed bowls, no serving spoons. I guess I had the idea of the rack (for show) but still wanted to plate in the kitchen for a "reduction sauce on the bottom" presentation. Hence, two disconnected ideas.

So I had this decorated roast sitting in the kitchen with all of the guests in the other room. What?  Am I going to call them just to see it?  Um, no.  Am I going to walk it into the dining room to only return it back with me to the kitchen? Not likely.

So, I removed all of the rib "hats" (that I just put on).  I also needed more time to now slice the ribs.  All of the other items were out and ready to plate (e.g warmed plates, food off the burners, out of the ovens - all cooling off.)  Bad timing all around.

So there was a little stress on my part to quickly slice, plate and get to the table.  People were around to help, but the point is that it should have be planned/anticipated. The goal is not to "realize something" when you are in the midst of it. Plan it out and you'll have a much more consistently enjoyable time entertaining.

Another little note to self  - and one to share!

So, the holidays are fast approaching. Hosting friends and family will come in one form or another.  Hopefully, some of these posts will help ensure your evening is a success.

Remember, the goal is to enjoy yourself!  That is what entertaining is all about.

Till then next time...

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On decorating - some handy numbers

In this month's issue of House Beautiful, they featured a column of the top 10 tips of key numbers in decorating. Each one was contributed by some of the premier interior designers.  Since I knew I would be clipping this article and storing it in my notebook, I thought I would share it in my blog for all of you to have as well.

Here they go:

1. A 36 inch-wide rectangular table is perfect for conversation.  A round table with a diameter of 48 inches seats six; a 60-inch round will handle eight standard dining chairs or 10 ballroom chairs.  - Charlotte Moss

Our top is a 58-inch round and works perfectly for 6 (and we've squeezed in 9, yes our close friends, with more narrow chairs.)  I also built a-72 inch topper that folds up for storage to accommodate 10 (and up to 13!)

2. How big should an overhead light fixture be? Just add the length and width of the room in feet, and whatever number you come up with is, in inches, your guide for the fixture's diameter.  So a 15 by 20 foot room would need a 35-inch wide chandelier. - Bunny Williams

We just replaced a chandelier in my parent's house and these measurements were right on.  One exception I have seen is when an oversized chandelier is deliberately used as impact or wow factor.  Never, ever go smaller - think of a large body and a small head.



3. One gallon of paint will cover about 400 square feet of wall.  - Alexa Hampton


4. Mount curtains as high as possible to give the room more height, and let them break 1.5 inches on the floor.  - Miles Redd

I did this in our bedroom.  Initially, we used the hardware location that was left by the previous owners.  While it may seem odd to move the hardware "off the window frame", it gave the room a more spacious and balanced feel.










5. A kitchen island should be about 38-inches high - a little taller than the countertops - to be comfortable for prep. - Thomas O'Brien


6. Curtains should be 2.5 to 3 times the width of the window.  If you are doing 2 panels, each should be 1.25 to 1.5 times the window width.  Buy a rod that's 20 inches wider than your window so it extends 10 inches on either side.  Your window will seem much wider than it really is. - Libby Langdon

I think this trick works if you have a window size disproportional (small) to the size of the room/wall.  In our bedroom space above, we had dormers and sconces so there was no need to add "heft" to the windows. 




7. The bottom of the dining room chandelier should hang 38 inches above the table. - Thom Filicia

This is an "ideal".  In my parent's house, we had to cheat this measurement down a little since we had a somewhat low ceiling.  38 inches up from table would have crowded this fixture up into the ceiling.  Maybe this means a different fixture might have worked better?  Perhaps. But, we loved it too much!!









8. Install light switches 36 inches above the floor and 1.5 to 2 inches to the side of the door trim. - Gil Schafer

In our Chicago place, we broke this rule too.  We had thick door frames/trim in between the formal living/dining/study areas.  We chose to locate the switches inside one of the frames.  They basically became invisible (white switches on white trim, just behind the floor lamp in photo).  It also cleaned up the inside wall so that nothing competed with the featured artwork.






9. For a standard 84-inch sofa with exposed legs and a tight back, you'll need 14 yards of plain 54-inch wide fabric.  Add 2 yards for a skirt. - Madeline Stuart


10. From classical times to today, the golden ratio has always been the perfect proportion: 1 to 1.62.
- Eric Cohler


Hope these help you out someday.  I know I'll keep them handy.

Till the next time...

On decorating - let's rethink the porch

Let's hear it for the summer!!!  Ok well, I know summer hasn't officially started yet, but any temps above 60 degrees are clearly worth celebrating.  It was one tough winter.

This year I am inspired to re-arrange the screened-in porch.  I am not sure if it's being driven by my excessive case of cabin fever or my recent trip to the Brimfield Antique Fair (post 5/25).  Either way, I am excited about what might result by playing around with a new layout and a few new accessories.

Step 1: Anchoring the room

Since the wicker couch is the largest piece of furniture, I decided to let it be the driver of the base layout.  Typically, I placed it on an angle in the far corner to provide a juxtaposition to the box-like space.  This year, I am deciding to embrace the existing dimensions and approach the space in a more symmetrical fashion.  As the pictures above and left indicate, I am positioning the couch along the far wall.  There is a divider column between the screens that acts as a natural centering point.  All of the other pieces will build out from this foundation.




Step 2: Adding the other dominant pieces

Going with the more traditional layout, the placement of the rug, coffee table and chairs is pretty simple.  The goal is to give the pieces space to breathe, yet also keeping them close enough for intimate conversation and functionality (e.g. within easy reach).  I guess the easiest rule of thumb is to consider the grouping as a "cluster" not an entire room "filler."

The easy chairs are a little over-sized so they were placed on an angle to the sofa (versus a more straight-on, side-by-side arrangement.)  Also if you notice the floor plan above, the entryway from the house is located behind the chairs.  Opening the chairs provides a more welcoming and inviting feel to the space.


Step 3: Finishing with accessories

The final step is now bringing in the cushions, pillows, end tables and other miscellaneous accessories.  While there is one (outside) floor lamp, I prefer the use of candles for most lighting situations.  I find pillar candles are best for outside use.  Tapers can too easily drip wax even in the slightest of breezes.  I keep the pillars in hurricane-type holders and enclosed lanterns.  Their designs seem to maximize the amount of light while protecting the flames from any wind

We picked up the indoor/outdoor rug at Target.  It's a great sisal-looking synthetic material that simply needs a hose to clean off.  Absolutely no worry of spills or wet weather.  

This year I also added a rustic sunburst mirror over the sofa.  I found it hidden in my parent's garage.  The frame is slightly rusty and the reflection is a little muddied.  A perfect little accent that helps complete the look

So start thinking of your own summer outside spaces.  Whether it's a porch, deck, patio or balcony, there are so many options to consider.  To make it more comfortable.  To make it more stylish.   To make it more efficient.  But most importantly, to make it more your own.

Till the next time...

PS.  One reader has requested a post on selecting bed linens.  If you have any additional ideas or comments, feel free to send them along!

On shopping - An "excursion" to Brimfield

For those of you unfamiliar with the experience of Brimfield, let me just say it is not for the faint of heart.  Billed as one of the worlds largest outdoor Antiques and Collectibles Show, it is an overwhelming display of bric-a-brac all in one place.  It's about a mile along Route 20 in Brimfield, Massachusetts.  The deceiving part to me is that while one mile seems big on it's own, it has football size fields of vendor stalls all down the many "fingers" along this one mile road.  (Yea, THAT big.)  Since I made the trip last year (my first visit), I kind of knew what to expect.  This time, I didn't let the size or crowds consume me.  As many of the blogs about the show suggest, it's best to go:

1.) Early in the day
2.) Wearing comfortable shoes and clothes (that you expect to get real dirty)
3.) With a clear sense of what you are looking for

The show runs from Tuesday through Sunday three times per year (May, July, September).  Each day it officially runs sun up to sun down (though I'd say many vendors break down around 3:30 when the crowds die down.) If you go early in the week, you have better selection.  If you go towards the end of the week, you have better deals (vendors don't want to bring everything home.)  I choose to go later in the week (this year Friday).  I simply want deals since I don't feel comfortable (e.g. knowledgeable) enough to buy anything too expensive.

An agenda or not?
On my first visit, I approached the trip as I would any random yard sale.  Looking for nothing in particular. Wondering what "surprises" might be discovered.  This, I think, is what did me in.  With way too many stalls, many selling virtually the same stuff,  I barely made it through 2 fingers in 4 hours.  Yikes!  I was exhausted and left wondering what I missed...

This year, following what some blogs recommend, I went in with an agenda.  I was looking for:
1.) vintage drawer pulls for a old dresser going on my screened-in porch
2.) vintage stemware, specifically my grandmother's pattern, since a few more wine glasses would be great for the set.  (Thinking ahead, I also brought along a picture of the pattern on my iphone to compare the detail work, if needed.)

What did I learn from having an agenda?  Something unexpected.  I found it yielded a little more work, but in a better, more focused way.  On one hand, I found myself moving quickly, efficiently through the stalls.  It's amazing how fast you can learn to scan an entire display.  For my needs, if I saw any crystal?  I stopped.  Any hardware or fixtures?  Stopped again.  Generally,  if a vendor features some items in the category of merchandise you seek, it's worth a look.  If you only see other items?  Don't waste your time. Move on.

The real work came when I found a stall with "potential."  Crystal patterns?  No problem.  Pretty easy to investigate and eliminate.  Hardware?  Another story.  Most was contained in large disorganized boxes.  When finally locating some drawer pulls, it became a mission to find "the right look at the right price."  This meant digging through dusty, rusty old fixtures that, of course, were NEVER grouped in similar types or designs. (Insult to injury was that I needed a matching set of 4.  Let's just say,  things in "sets" are rare in these types of venues. Ugh.)  This rummaging pattern went on for most of the day.  My hands were caked with dirt and rust.

Results?

It was an enjoyable, albeit tiring, day.  I had success with the drawer pulls, but not with the crystal.  The purchased pulls were solid brass with a nice, aged patina.  I needed four, but I found five, so I bought them all.  (Just in case.)  They worked beautifully.  See the finished piece at right.

Given my newly honed rapid-fire scan technique, I was also able to make through about 2/3 of the show in one day.  (Again, yea, it's that big.)  This also included a fun lunch with friends at the bustling (um, more like crowded beyond capacity) food court.

Other finds along the way?
Funny, despite being on such a vision quest, I still was able to spot some random, totally unexpected items.  I would have loved to have them, but alas, the "bargaining" I received on them was still a little out of my comfort zone.  Nonetheless, I snapped some photos to share with you.

This weathered mirror caught my eye as a fun piece to have out on the screened-in porch.  Casual and worn.  Mirrored inserts to help reflect light and add depth.  $300?  Not outrageous, but too much for impulse.

LOVED this ceiling light fixture.  Highly polished chrome with a chunky, industrial feel.  While the photo is a little vague, its size was pretty hefty.  Thought it might look great in our kitchen.  For curiosity, I later outlined its measurements at home.  Way too over sized.  Good thing.  Price was way to over sized as well.  $900

This vendor had a ton of these vintage metal screens.  The braids were about 1/4" thick and had a great distressed white finish.  Again I could see a couple of these on our screened in porch, hanging as a backdrop to the wicker couch.  They would be suspended in front of the large screen windows, adding a little bit of detail without blocking any airflow.  Couldn't get a price since ALL OF THEM were sold.  (I guess I was victim to the pitfalls of attending later in the week...)

This is one of those pieces that nags me.  I think I let this one get away.  It could have been used in any number of rooms.  On an entry table.  The living room bookcase.  The dining room console. One of those "statement" pieces.  I still wonder why I didn't let the impulse move me.  The price was $250, but the clock didn't work.  Since when have I ever been obsessed with time?!  Oh well...I have to let it go... I have to let it go...



All in all, I whole heartedly recommend going to Brimfield!  No matter what your decorative style, there's something for everyone.  You have 3 opportunities per year to get there (though I hear the July event can be uncomfortably hot.)  Go in looking for one thing and come out with something else.  You never know what you might find.  And decide on an agenda or don't.  Either way, set your expectations so that you can enjoy all that it offers (and not get overwhelmed by all that it offers.)

Till the next time...

On decorating outside spaces - a little secret about faux

I can't believe I am going to admit this.  Faux?  Really?  The words conjure up images of cheesy thick plastic flora that look as natural as the figures in It's A Small World at Disney.  (um...hyeah...)  Well, I am now a convert albeit in certain circumstances.  When there's some location that's set back and difficult to "naturally" maintain, the faux option actually works.  Here's how it unfolded for me...

Our house features two built-in flower boxes off the second floor. Trouble is, they are problematic.  Southern exposure with all-day direct sun.  No shade.  Shallow depth for soil.  Hovering just above the "radiating in heat" asphalt shingle roof.  In front of inoperable windows.  Need I go on?  Picture a barren wasteland.  Cue: blowing tumbleweed.  Needless to say, these boxes sat empty for the first five years.

So, I happened to see this picture (at left) in a magazine.  It's of a house similar to ours (well maybe a little bigger) with what looks to be a somewhat similar flower box issue. Notice, however, the box is overflowing with lush flowers.  It got me thinking...

Now I know photo shoots create scenes that can never be maintained in real life.  But this image reminded me that, at a distance, no one can tell if these flowers are real or not.  My theory was since our flower boxes were like the the one in the photo (e.g. troublesome), maybe I could possibly pull off a look that will appear lifelike as well.  No one would need to (immediately) know it was faux.  One that can exist in our blast furnace location!

I set out to see what options were available.  I first scouted the local establishments like Michaels, Home Depot and Lowes.  Um, let's just say again, "bad theme park."  No distance could make these items look good.

I next went online.  Google Search gave me a number of options for outside artificial flowers, but the best ones were:

     - hooksandlattice.com
     - qualitysilkplants.com
     - artificialplantsandtrees.com


The price points will feel initially high.  In my mind, however, if the quality is there (natural looking) and they can last two or three seasons, then the price is basically a wash versus purchasing live plants each year.  (For our situation, we really didn't have a choice. What? A dried stick arrangement?)

I admit I researched the "return policy of all online vendors" before I made a single purchase.  Descriptive copy and owner reviews are good.  Seeing the items in hand is most critical - the ultimate "go/no- go" decision point.  If there was any question, the stuff was going back.

The items arrived and I was pleasantly surprised.  Yes, up close, you could see the plastic stems and joints where two items were "snapped" together.  But standing back only a foot or two, everything looked great.

Now came the process of  figuring out how to arrange them.  There were two objectives:
1.) they look lifelike & natural and
2.) they withstand the elements (wind & rain)
I honestly had this fear of arriving home one day and seeing them cascading down the roof and all over the front lawn.  A little embarrassing - like someone pulling off your clip-on bow tie...

Year one (last year), my approach was too labor intensive.  I climbed up with a bunch of materials.  I carefully placed/arranged each "stem" in a gravel base in each box.  I also hammered nails in strategically placed positions on the front, back and sides of each box.  Fishing line was then criss-crossed throughout the arrangement (within and between stems) as a tight grid to hold everything in place.  It worked.  But, I knew there had to be better way...

Jumping ahead to year two, I wanted to create something easier.  This time, I decided to build an entire framework to just "sit" in the boxes.  (And, why didn't I think of this before?) A simple wood frame.  A little chicken wire.  Some plastic twist ties to hold the stems in place.  Done.  Carry ONLY two items (not the litany of stems, tools, nails, line, etc.) up the ladder in the Spring.  Carry two items down the ladder in the fall.  And, I don't have to re-create the wheel each year!  I guess I could add/swap in a new color, but basically the boxes are ready to go.  I like that.

So, get rid of all your outdated images of outdoor artificial plants.  (Oh yea, the industry calls them "artificial", not "fake".)  While close scrutiny still gives away their secret, a small amount of distance gives them all the room they need.  To be beautiful.  To be lifelike.  To be a perfect design solution.

Till the next time...

The finished product!  (Sshhh, don't tell anyone...)

On building your look - "creative" resourcing

When it comes to items for the home, I need to establish I am not an impulse buyer.  Nor am I a full "retail price paying" buyer.  Nor a total discount bin or yard sale scavenger (even though they can be fun on occasion.)  I think first and foremost I am a design idea resourcer.  Whether it's home magazines, coffee-table books or just things crossing my path, I take it all in.  Restaurant decors.  Window & store displays.  Other people's homes.  I make notes.  Rip out pages.  Print images from the web. Snap photos with my phone.  Search pricing.  They are all collected in my notebook.  (And now, sometimes on my blog!)

I've mentioned the notebook in previous entries.  The beauty of it is simply keeping track of what I like.  As obvious as it seems, a little "reminder" is helpful.  Of color combinations.  Of furniture groupings.  Of drawer knobs, tile patterns and fabrics.  You see, maybe it's option overload, but when I go into stores, I think I know exactly what I want.  Well? A strange thing happens.  Something about an entire "room/wall/
encyclopedic binder" of options sets me in decision paralysis. Was it this one or this one? Was it smooth or textured?  I can't remember... Now it's, WAIT!  What did I capture in the notebook?...

And being a resourcer pays off!  By having an understanding of costs/values, you now know when you have a a good deal in front of you.

For example, I loved this lamp.  I first saw it in a magazine layout.  Then located it on the web. Learned the cost.  Added to my notebook.   $1,345.00!?  Um, that'll stay on my wish list...

About a year later,  I had some time to kill so I stopped by Tuesday Morning  - a first quality, closeout store. No agenda. No specific item needed.  I guess, the dreaded term for salespeople, "just browsing."

Lo and behold, there it was (or maybe a close knock-off). AND it was selling for $99 - less than 1/10th of the suggested retail cost. I immediately bought it.  No question. No guilt. (Even called another location to complete the pair!)

Now that is MY version of impulse buying.  Smart.



So, what are some of my go-to "creative resources"?  Here's a recap of my fav's:

1. First quality closeouts
As mentioned in the example, for tabletop, bedding and accessories, I am a huge fan of the stores that feature first quality merchandise at close-out prices.  These are names like Tuesday Morning, Homegoods, Overstock.com and Steinmart. Purchases have included brands like Waterford, Ralph Lauren, Wamsutta, Frette and Wedgwood.  Don't forget the sales tables in the better department stores either (Barney's, Bloomingdales). The brands only get better.

All of these sources are pretty hit-or-miss, so you are best going in without a certain item in mind. Like the lamps above, you'll be surprised at what you might find when you least expect it. Remember, the merchandise at the close-out stores is continually updated so it's OK (and best) to frequently check back in.

2. Family heirlooms
Never, ever pass up the chance to acquire family treasures.  These are some of the premier items that can make your home "historied" and unique.  I'm not talking about the particle board bookcase you used in middle school.  These are things from when your parents were first together, or were passed down from earlier generations. Dishes, crystal, furniture, linens, portraits.  They may initially feel a little incongruous to your current style, but take them just the same.  You'd be surprised how often you revisit them at a later date only to find your perspective has changed.  Maybe you've now seen something like them reinterpreted to more modern environments? Maybe they now embody a color or shape that you've since grown to love? Who knows?  But I can assure you, they will be more meaningful to you than the disposable stuff you find in most retailers today.

3. Ebay
I can't stop raving about Ebay.  It seems no matter what you're looking for, it's being sold there.  I have purchased plates, glasses, fabric - even dining room chairs.  It should be approached much like the first quality, close-out-like establishments.  You can go into it looking for something special, yet you might leave with something totally unexpected.  It also pays to keep going back since again since the inventory is constantly changing.

You'll find some stuff being sold "auction-style" where bidding and time limits are the name of the game.  Other items are "buy it now".  Those have fixed prices that generally stay up until the item is sold.  (Note: always check for shipping costs.  The item prices may seem reasonable, but when shipping is added, the deal falls apart.)

4. Sample sales/Floor models
I always seem to keep an eye out for big SALE signs.  Arguably, many times the mark-downs are "much ado about nothing."  20% off retail?  Why bother...  There are, however, some deals to be had especially when they are for sample/floor models.  These top quality items can be pretty significantly marked down.  The wear and tear is usually what will occur in the first year at home anyway. Also be sure to shop the boutiques.  These single-proprietor stores generally have a lot more at stake in getting rid of unwanted inventory.

If you live near "to the trade" design centers, watch for ads that announce showroom sample sales available to the public.  While the price points will be higher than the average retail store, the quality and design is so much better.  I would recommend getting to know a designer before hand to get a better sense of pricing, brands and what a good deal might look like. Better yet, see if they are going and join them! You might just get a tip or two.  A designer friend of mine snagged me a sofa in Big D.  Great deal and I've now had it for years.  (Continued thanks, Neal!)

Don't forget to shop for sales on the web. Most of the bigger sites have built in navigation (tabs) to items specifically marked down.  Never hurts to check them out.  For linens, I also recently found that BBJ Linens, a major national online party rental supplier, launched a site selling hugely discounted (used) inventory. There are some great deals there, but beware.  They do not provide information about specific materials.  I had to call and get someone on the phone.  Some of the cheaper items are for synthetic materials.  (Ick.  Not a favorite of mine, as mentioned in an earlier post.)

5. Estate sales, yard sales and antique stores
Let's be clear , I am not talking about high-high end stuff here.  I leave that to the experts.  I am also not talking about the search for an undiscovered money maker.  You know, an original Picasso for just $20?  I leave that to the guys on TV - American Pickers.  My recommended target?  Relatively small and inexpensive items.  Sometimes it's a lone plate that happens to be from one of my patterns.  Maybe it's some quirky objet d'art that will be fun addition to a bookcase. Occasionally you might find a larger, pricier item like a chair or mirror.  How do you know good deals?  My advice?  Go with your gut. Value is only really determined what the buyer (you) is willing to pay.  Don't get caught up in it.  Just make a reasonable (not insulting) offer. All they can say is "no."

Later this Spring, I plan to do a blog specifically on a visit to the Brimfield Antique show - one of the largest outdoor exhibits in the country.  They have 3 events per year in the Spring, Summer & Fall. It's an amazing collection (talk about option overload.)  Not for the weary...

6. Deal-of-the-day shopping sites
These types of member only sites are exploding.  It seems there is a new one (or one I've never heard of) being promoted daily. With me, it first started as a clothing source (Rue La La).  Then it moved to discounts on local businesses (Groupon).  Now it's seems to be more focused on home decorating.

My favorites are One Kings Lane, Gilt/Home and Rue la La/Home.  They are clearly built for the consummate shopper.  Email updates are sent everyday, announcing the latest designers/stores.  Some also send "reminder" emails letting you know the sales are about to begin.

A little information overload for my taste, but I've been impressed with some of the featured items.  I have seen major high-end brands like Safavieh rugs, Kate Spade china, Barbara Barry/Henrendon furniture.  Like always, you must have done your homework to know the good deals from the great deals.  These sites are built specifically to not leave a lot of time for decision making.  There have been a couple of times where I hesitated from buying, only to find the items sold when I returned.  Not a huge loss in the scheme of things, but a little annoying.  And as with all online shopping sites, be sure you know all shipping (and sales tax) costs before you buy.  These charges can add a pretty sizable chunk to the total price paid.

In terms of keeping up with all these sites, I find it's impossible.  I most likely delete 80% of inbound messages without even opening them. Like I mentioned before, way too many deals to comprehend.  If you are looking for something in particular, the sites post future events so you can plan accordingly.  For me, I'll click-through the link when I have the down time to "just browse."  It's a fun escape, not only to buy or build the wish list, but also to learn.  To jot down notes.  Even capture images (I love "print screen").  All additional information to help confirm a good deal when you see it again!

So, as always, I hope I have introduced you to something new.  New approaches.  New resources to outfit your home.  I wouldn't say to now eliminate anything you've already been doing.  Consider this additive.  Because the more you are exposed to ideas, products and pricing, the more comfortable you become in what you like and what you can afford.

(NOTE: If you would like to become a member of one of these invitation-only sites, send me an email and I'll be your sponsor.  See my email link below.)

Till the next time...

On entertaining - de-constructing the perfect summer dinner party

OK. I can't help it.  I am not sure it's the positive feedback received or the fact that I am SOOOO ready for  summer.  Whatever the reason, I am doing another "entertaining" themed post -  now inspired by the warm weather.  I thought I would break down some of the elements to plan and execute a perfect summer dinner party.  (The main reason it's labeled "summer" is that it's al fresco.  Most everything would remain for an indoor event except building in some weather contingency options.) So here goes...

1. Plan the stage - the visual experience
Start with an idea that will act as the "umbrella" theme to your planning.  Is it a color?  Is it a menu?  Is it simply that you want to use your mother's china that already has a color palate/formality already built in?  Whatever it is.  Identify it.  Own it.  Build everything around it.  Every thought.  Every idea.  Capture them in your notebook.

Our party was going to celebrate the summer.  The inspiration was the color blue.  From the sky.  From my china.  Not much more than that.  I then went about the house, searching for anything that had a shade of blue in it (or would coordinate with blue e.g. silver, black, white...) Vases, bowls, planting pots, coasters.  Like I've suggested before, all was eventually laid out on a table. Saw what worked together.  What felt off.  What vibe was given. What quantity was available.*  Invitations, place cards and individual menus were then selected/
designed to reflect this direction.

I know some people would recommend starting party planning first with the number of guests in mind.  In fact, a couple we know only host gatherings of either 6 or 12.  Not 7.  Not 13.  They clearly know what works for them!.  Anyway, I choose to let the "theme" be my key driver.  For example, if it's a relaxed, old fashioned BBQ, then numbers really don't matter.  Actually, the more the merrier.  But if you are looking to elevate the experience a little, larger numbers become more of an issue.  Seating.  Place settings.  Menu complexity. You see what I mean. In my world, I may choose an odd number, like say 7, if maybe that's the total number of china/plates I have of one pattern or outside chairs available.

So, I now had a theme.  I also had a sense of some initial table decor and the number of planned guests.  I then started to think about the stage.  In some scenarios, this might be a table & chairs in the middle of the lawn. Simple. Quietly elegant.  On this particular occasion, I wanted to create an outdoor room.  Something with spatial definition.  But, the sky was to be the only ceiling.  I sketched out some initial thoughts. Took a bunch of measurements.  Returned to search the house, the garage, my parent's garage, to see what elements were available to fully create this environment.  Ultimately, I had to make some alterations, but the vision was still realized.

2. Outline the menu - the taste experience
Some people again might start with menu planning first.  That's totally OK.  I agree food IS the most critical element to a successful dinner party and it could even drive an overall theme (e.g. your world's famous ribs).  For me though, starting with a theme helps establish a overarching framework. It works as a filter to help narrow down and simplify your planning options.  Most obviously, it's better to create a menu once you've agreed to a couple of things: the degree of formality and the number of people.

There's a little hidden benefit of summer entertaining - more options can be made ahead of time and served chilled.  Then again, no matter what time of year it is, I always recommend menu items for dinner parties that have little to no last minute prep. Select recipes where much of it can be done a day or two before - to better enjoy your party.  But in the summer, the options expand.  Appetizers, salads, soups, even entrees.  Makes things so much easier.  It becomes mostly an exercise in plating not hovering over a hot stove.  Outdoor grilling also becomes more accessible.  Stay outside, closer to you guests, during preparation.  There's also a strong likelihood one of your guest is also a "griller" and would willingly step in should you be need to be pulled away.

For this particular evening, we chose:  Course 1: chilled melon soup, Course 2: masala grilled shrimp skewers, Course 3: grilled hoisin-marinated pork medallions over chilled 3 pea salad, Course 4: panna cotta with balsamic berries
Crisp Sauvignon Blancs and light Pinot Noirs were paired with the courses.

3. Mix up the mix

Nothing makes for a great party than a good mix of people.  For us, there is a core group of "usual suspects" who basically have a standing invitation.  It's almost that we have to confirm if they "aren't coming" versus the other way around.  But, what we really like is to always add some newbee's into the fray.  The "core" itself is very welcoming, helping folks make their way around should the hosts be pre-occupied elsewhere.  But, most importantly, adding to "the mix" really makes the evening special, for everyone.  Everyone experiences something new.  New people.  New backgrounds.  New conversations.  Maybe even new friendships.

4. Consider ice breakers

OK. This idea was first introduced to us by our close friends in Chicago.  (Shout out to L&S!)  It has now become standard operating practice for all our get-togethers.  It's a simple as this - what better way to get people talking/mingling than to give them "team assignments".  No these are not anything complicated or needing a degree in physics.  It can be something as easy as assigning teams who help plate each of the courses. (Hum...an extra set of hands?  An added benefit to you!)

At one party, there were so many birthdays celebrated around that time, during cocktail hour, we had everyone put decorations on frosted cupcakes.

Works every time!

The key is to announce/establish the icebreakers during the opening cocktail hour. Have "stations/assignments" preprinted for people to read.  Folks now have something to talk about other than the standard opening "what do you do?" or "how do you know the hosts?"  Some may break into terror - "I'm not a designer!!" but even THAT is a more fun conversation starter....

5. Signature cocktail
Many entertaining books recommend a signature cocktail.  I totally embrace this.  For me it operates on a couple of levels.  First, it identifies the evening as special.  "Wow.  You selected a specific drink for this evening?  You clearly put a lot of thought into this."  It possibly might break your guests out of their routine and have them try something new, exciting.

Next, a signature cocktail can begin to set the stage for the evening.  You have a theme.  It was captured in the invitation.  Now, they might get exposed to another aspect of it.  Right as they walk in the door!  For example: Yummy Pomegranate margaritas.  Hummm...something special from the Southwest tonight?

Finally, a signature cocktail actually helps out the hosts.  Preferably, it again should be prepped and chilled ahead of time.  All you need are glasses and pitchers.  It also cuts down on the need for a fully stocked bar since most people will opt for it.  There may be some die-hards, but finding drink solutions for a few is far easier than trying to anticipate the entire crowd.

For this particular event, we chose a ginger mojito - light, summer, refreshing with fresh mint and an Asian influence.

6. Go with the flow
This is an understatement.  Never mind what can sometimes happen during even the the best of parties, when working with weather, you need to be totally flexible.  Always build in contingency plans.  These plans are not just for rain, either.

Rain is sometimes predicted well enough in advance for you to move the event indoors.  Not the best situation, but still very doable.  If you don't have the room inside for a sitdown, arrange things buffet-style.  No one need to know you shifted to plan B.

Wind and humidity also need to be considered.  One year, it was so humid that on the day of the party, we moved the table inside, in our foyer.  (Luckily, we live in an 1920's house where foyers were designed to be overscale.)  Everyone loved the "surprise location" but I think, more importantly, the air conditioning!!

A nice breeze can make a night outside glorious.  Strong winds?  Not so much. There's nothing worse than having to scramble to keep things from flying off the table or getting knocked over.  Never mind having candles being unable to stay lit!  Once we set up dinner on a deck overlooking the ocean.  Picturesque, yes. But the winds made it impossible. We dined mostly in the dark!  (Darn candles!) Should have "bit the bullet" and moved inside...

The weather for this featured party was a little humid, but we knew that in advance.  Therefore we set up fans outside, out of view from the table, to provide some enhanced air movement throughout the night.  One guest commented later "The weather was just perfect.  There was a steady breeze the entire night!"  I just smiled...

So begin planning your summer 2011 soiree!  The warm weather is right around the corner.  And have some fun with it.  Try something new.  Express your creativity.  Plan it all ahead. Your friends will love it!

Till next time....

*Blog note: There's nothing better than Ebay, Craigslist, Homegoods or Party Rental companies to help fill in gaps of table decor or fixtures.  For events on a lawn, I swear by the rental chairs featured in the photo.  They are specifically designed with flat legs that do not "sink" into the ground.  The cobalt water glasses were from Ebay.  I had one cobalt votive candle and went looking to see if Ebay had more.  I came across the water glasses for about the same price and "had to have them." 

On entertaining - "swear bys" for setting a table

Since I seem to be blogging lately with an entertaining theme, I thought I would share my macro-level "swear by" check list when it comes to setting a table. These guiding thoughts are specifically for an occasion, formal or informal, where you are hosting special friends and guests. No, these are not for the everyday mid-week suppers where just sitting down together feels like a huge accomplishment!  Consider them just some little touches to help set the perfect stage.

It's funny how differently each one of them was acquired.  One was from a general entertaining coffee table book.  Two were "learned the hard way."  (Yea.  I'll get into that.)  And best of all, two were passed along from two favored friends who's voices I hear, still to this day, speaking them to me as I open the cupboard to pull out my first plate.  A shout out goes to DF and TS!

So here goes...

1. Start on a rich foundation
Before you put down a table cloth, start with a pad.  These can be easily and inexpensively purchased at stores like Bed, Bath and Beyond.  For me, they work on 2 different levels.  First there's the practical level -  to protect the table underneath. Spilled liquids or dropped utensils can unexpectedly damage the finish of fine woods. Pads obviously provide an extra buffer.  Second, and to me more importantly, is the experience level.  This is especially critical if you are using hard thin tables (plywood rentals, molded synthetics, particle board) or even glass.  Pads provide a softer platform.  As you rest your hands or replace your knife, you feel a little extra something.  A richness. Not hugely noticeable, but certainly more enjoyable.  There's also the sound barrier.  Pads muffle the "tin-y" or hard sounds often made when putting things down on these types of surfaces.  Keep the din of conversation the only thing front and center.

2. Always go with the natural fibers
There are so many varieties of table linens out there.  I know "from my mother" the benefits of blended and synthetic materials - no ironing, better lasting color, easy drape, did I mention, no ironing?  But I just can't do it.  The tactile nature is just off.  There's nothing like the touch of linen or cotton.

Whether it be starch crisp or loose press, they simply feel more natural, more comfortable.  And they also provide better absorbency.  Liquids just bead up on the other stuff.  I would rather have a spill contained on a napkin or tablecloth versus having it run down onto the chair or carpet.  If you don't like to iron, send them to the dry cleaners.  They'll launder and return them individually pinned to hangers!  Yea, I once tried a synthetic napkin/placemat set with organza trim.  Scratchy to wipe the mouth.  Little absorbency.  A puckered mess once laundered due to cotton thread (shrinkage) used with 2 different (non-shrinkage) materials.  Difficult to iron so not to melt the material.  Good riddance...

3. Centerpieces above or below

That's above eye level or below.  This I had previously "heard" but unfortunately had to learn, again the hard way.  Extravagant centerpieces are great for show tables.  Those that are on display at Macy's or sponsored for design competitions.  Big. Fun. Very dramatic. Now...try sitting down and talking through one.  Yea.  During the middle of dinner, I had people ask if they could move the centerpiece to the side table.

Um, what do you say?  No?  My decor is more important? Awkward... Conversation is the name of the game at a successful dinner gathering.  It should not be limited to those solely on your right and left.  There are those across from you, diagonal to you.  Just about anyone within earshot.  Nothing inhibits good conversation like an miss-sized centerpiece.  For most of us, that's keeping its maximum height below eye level. There are a few who might have trumpet vases or some other device that can elevate the floral mass above eye level.  Same objective still holds - keep a clear line of sight for those seated. Period.  I wouldn't recommend this elevated option outdoors, though.  Consider those trees gently bending in the wind... arrangements don't bend, they just topple over.

4. Think multi-dimensional
Stimulate the eyes.  Look for a variety of elements to visually engage your guests.  Layered linens, contrasting plates (see post 3/17), and varying heights can independently or together create a symphony of texture and dimension.  This is another area to play and discover.  For example, if you have a gold or fall theme, consider the addition of amber glass in the form of wine/water glasses or small vases.  In order to help punch the blue color in one scape, I once used blue chinoiserie inspired drink coasters with votive candles on top at every place setting.  Be creative and go around your house.  Check in your prop closet (see Post 2/7).  Some items alone may not seem like much.  But together, they can create a look that's totally unique.

5. Something new for everyone, everytime
This is a concept I completely embrace.  It's basically considering all your guests as repeat visitors.  With this in mind,  you then will be inspired to continually shake things up.  Don't rest on status quo.  With each opportunity, make sure everyone experiences something new.  Change the color scheme.  Go informal.  Try a table in another room. Go al fresco. Borrow some new silverware.  Keep your friends and family guessing, no matter how often they've been over.  It will always make a trip to your house something special.

I must confess there is some merit with the opposite perspective to #5 whereby keeping table setting consistent.  A friend of mine once expressed it to me this way - repetition firmly implants that singular image/experience in your mind, a memory.  Consider the family dinners at your Grandmother's house.  Chances are she served everything on the same china with the same tablecloth, etc.  You may not remember a specific day or meal, but you'll always associate that look with her.  It's warm.  It's comforting.  Not my cup of tea, but certainly not a bad way of thinking either.  So, #5, I leave it up to you to decide which one works best.

Till the next time...

To answer any questions about placement.
Courtesy of Domino Magazine, sadly out of print

End of a perfect evening...